Once again I attempt the Blog. I don't know why I don't do it. It's such a great place to talk and think. I am by nature a very open person who journals and I feel the need to hold back in a forum such as this. It's hard not to get too personal as that is my natural inclination. And as some people discovered when beginning their blog adventures, this isn't a private space.
This past year has been busy, stressful, interesting, fun and I have evolved. I can't say it's been the best. I've never felt more stressed, never experienced the physical affects of stress in this way and never felt that I needed to get out of this world more. Not in a, "I'm going to kill myself" way, just in a "this can't be worth it" way. But then you get through it, you learn, you change, you get stronger. I can't believe what humans can endure. I am not saying in the slightest that my life is harder than the average person. I have a wonderful life, a wonderful husband and family, a great job, and a fabulous boss. Who could ask for more? What I'm saying is that just when you think you can't take any more, you can. Most of the time you are wiser and stronger for having gone through it.
I have to admit that there were times this past year when I thought, there was no way I was going to make it. But I did, and I will. So much of struggle is psychological. This is where I want to grow. I want to learn the art of positivity. I want to become a person that faces struggle with more grace and patience than I do. Doing this is impossible (I believe) if you are not in the right physical space. Everything is so connected to each other. This will tie in with this years lent - a fresh start...
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